For the past few month or so I thought I was doing ok. I was super stressed out - and going crazy at times. I was doing more though, which I took as a good sign. I was doing more around the house and making more meals at home. Of course - I haven't worked on my other house and really need to get over there so I can get it done. I just decided to focus on a few other things right now that need my attention.
I've really been trying to do the best I could. I've been trying to step up and be harder on my kids and address some issues that have come up recently in other areas.
My kids had their well checks ups. Malea's Dr. surely made me feel like I wasn't doing enough. I feel like all of my energy is being wrapped up in her. I'm constantly on her about everything and checking up on her. The Dr. said I need to do more though....I just don't know how I'm supposed to fit more in. She did say that I was too nice in regards to loads of other things - like at the psych office and with Malea especially. I just don't feel like I'm being that nice. I feel really mean.
I know I give my kids more than they need - we have always done that though. It is a little excessive now I suppose - but I still feel very much like I'm constantly letting them down. I'm just trying to make up for my lack of being able to constantly be there for them.
Malea is now 5'6.25 - so she is a 1/4 inch taller than me. I'm not sure that she looks it yet - but it was inevitable. Keagan is 59.5 inches and weights a hefty 60 lbs. Keagan is in the 71st percentile for height and 80th for weight - but the Dr. said that it was all good since he's all muscle. He sure is - he's a strong one! Malea is in the 96th percentile for height and 80th for weight. I don't know how they do those weight ones because I definitely don't feel like either of my kids are fat - but I think because they are taller - height isn't taken in to consideration.
I finally joined a gym and am trying to do that. I feel ok doing it since I am able to go home and see the kids for a while before I go to the gym. Tonight Malea really wanted to stay the night at my parents after a YFC outing. I didn't think I could do that since I go to the gym at 8am tomorrow. However - I reached out to my BIL and was able to get Keagan to spend the night there. It is good for my kids to get away from each other occasionally. I'll be alone - but I have plenty to do - so it won't be that bad. I won't be home until late enough anyway and go to the gym in the morning. I generally hate sleeping alone - and hope that since I haven't been sleeping well - tonight will be good.
I am a wife and mother of 2. I have many different interests - baking, home renovations, music, education ;)