I have never really been a positive person. Saying this - I didn't go around complaining all the time. I don't like to be around negative people - but have never really liked overly happy people either. I've just had several things happen in my life that made me know that things aren't always happy - there are bad people and bad things that happen every day.
I do always try to remind myself that things could be so much more difficult or worse. It is really hard though.
I would love for things to get better - they just aren't. Things keep getting worse - I keep getting more angry. Many of the things that are making me angry have to do with me getting walked all over and not standing up for myself. If I ever get to the point where I can do that - I will save myself so much anger. I just have so few people in my life - that I don't want to jeopardize the people that still actually associate with me.
Malea has been better for the most part. It is a struggle if Keagan and Malea have to be alone for more than 2 hours though. With Spring Break coming up - I'm not sure how I'm going to handle that. My work is still refusing to let me work from home and I don't have enough days to take the whole 7 days off. I was thinking of taking 3 as they want to go somewhere. I struggle with taking that time off from the house. My progress has been so slow the last few weeks and I feel like I'm never going to get to where I need to be - I'm going to end up still working on this house all summer. Malea still has a long way to go and I can't say we are moving forward yet - but we aren't getting worse right now - so that is a positive.
Keagan is Mr. Funny Man lately. He's just always saying things that are so hilarious - even if he doesn't mean them to be. He never gets mad if I laugh - so at least he doesn't think I'm making fun of him. It is nice that almost every day he does make me laugh. We haven't been reading as much as we should - but I made a point to work on that last week. He was excited to read this whole book for AR. Usually I have to help - but he did that one all on his own ;) He's all about eating healthy lately as well. Both kids actually are - so I need to help work on this for dinner. When I make dinner - we eat healthy, but being on the go so much - we eat out too much. Today Keagan only took healthy things in his lunch. With his allergies - fruit is about the only healthy thing for a snack you can send - so it is really difficult. Too bad he doesn't like raw veggies - that would help.
Next weekend Malea is going to Soul Blast where she'll listen to a bunch of Christian bands for 3 days and socialize with other youth around the area. It will be nice just to have Keagan to occupy while I'm at the house. I need to get some painting done - he wants to help - so we'll see how that goes ;) Hoping to get the tub installed, painting done and floor ready for tile. Progress is happening - you just wouldn't know from walking in and looking around.
I am a wife and mother of 2. I have many different interests - baking, home renovations, music, education ;)