I've been so angry lately. I'm angry that Dave was taken from me so abruptly of course - but it is all just piling up.
I have some very important papers that have come up missing - due to someone putting them elsewhere. I had spent all last Friday sorting everything to file and had left a few piles out to deal with when I got back. They weren't there when I returned :( So - that has just been nagging at me while I continue to look for them :( It isn't something I can have replaced - so it is beyond frustrating.
I'm angry that I just have to constantly nag Malea :( I get that she's grieving as well - but just not doing things is not an option :( I've been wanting to go to the movies for 2 weeks now. I finally had planned to go today and she woke up and was very mean. Then I suggested it later and it was just not enough time for her to get ready. I can't leave her home alone - because she'll just not do what she's supposed to do.
Keagan is doing pretty great - I just wish he wouldn't fight with Malea so much. They both physically fight and it is just irritating. My sister and I fought occasionally - but my parents weren't home when we did....they actually just call me non stop when I'm not home whining about each other.
I'm angry that I can't motivate myself to do anything....I need to workout - I have actually had time to do it - I just can't make myself do it. It seems like looking in the mirror would be motivation enough - but sadly it is not :( I have at least kept the weight off that I lost since I started having gall bladder issues.
I just wish I could get past this. Malea said the other day that I was myself again - I wasn't as depressed. I tried not to have my grief affect them - but I guess I haven't succeeded. It is just so hard :(
I thought the holidays would be hard - but maybe they were just a distraction for me.
I am a wife and mother of 2. I have many different interests - baking, home renovations, music, education ;)